Wednesday, 5 March 2008
Life without Yogi....
....Is hell. I can't describe it in any other way. He was so full of life and such a massive part of our lives. He has left the most unbelievable open wound.
When we first said goodbye, in a way there was a sense of relief in as much as no more worrying, no more checking, no more wondering when it would happen. Plus the incredible grief that went with it. Now, everything just seems so final. His ashes are back, there is nothing left anymore. In Norfolk it seemed easier somehow. Surrounded by people and other distractions. Larry seemed OK too. Back at home everything just feels so empty. I'm not sure if Larry is depressed. He hasn't ventured upstairs at all and just seems happy to sleep in his basket. He still wants to walk though. It could be his hips are sore (he has arthritis and hip displacia). I have upped his medication but so far it hasn't made any difference. I will give it a little more time and then take him to see John. I am trying to put a brave face on it but really struggling. I need to because I can't afford to sink. Mum is having a mastectomy next week and I have to stay strong. Not doing so well today. I now (in Handh's words) have a soggy keyboard again.