Saturday 15 December 2007

Worrying times

This week it's my Mum worrying me and not Yogi. She is going into hospital on Tuesday to have her adrenal gland removed. this is one of the areas her cancer has spread to. I was under the impression that she would have her adrenal gland removed, then the portion of her lung that is cancerous and then her breast. And then possibly very naively, I thought that she would be more or less OK. Possibly needing chemo but that the treatment schedule was decided. Now I find out that further treatment will be dependent on the results of the adrenal gland removal. She is sounding worried which worries me even more. She is also saying that some of the symptoms she is having are as a result of having cancer. She has never said that before either. I am SO very scared and trying not to show it. Trying to carry on as normal.
I read an article in a magazine written by someone who has had cancer and they said that one of the hardest things was seeing the people that loved them worrying and trying to help with suggestions etc but ultimately underneath showing their fear (naturally). The thing that helped them most was just being treated normally. How the hell do you do that ?

On a lighter note today I have braved the shops again trying to do some Christmas shopping. Quite successful but still not quite finished.
I am supposed to be going to the office Christmas party on Wednesday. Not sure if I'm going yet as it depends on Mum. But I might do as it may be better that sitting at home worrying. Mum thinks I should go too.
I am not usually one for the Christmas bashes each year. I usually end up going though because it's easier than going through endless lame excuses and also don't like to be thought of as "unsociable" even though I am :o)
It should be quite impressive. The theme is "One night in Bangkok" http://www.the-christmas-company.co.uk/venues/miltonkeynes/entertain.htm and it should be quite a lavish affair. Lesley has offered me a Thai dress to wear. Sadly it isn't fancy dress. I wish it was now with the offer of that. Thank you Lesley, that was such a kind thought. I bet the dress is stunning.
I am having the usual issues of what I SHOULD wear though. I am not one to dress up at all normally. I spend most of my waking hours scruffy except for work. If I could go in jeans I would be happier.....
Still, if I go, I am sure I will be fine once I get "into the swing" and it's always quite good watching people that you see each day letting their hair down. Think I will take my camera :o)

Yogi and Larry are being little stars (as ever) I have just buried my face into Larry's neck for a dose of bliss. It makes me feel calmer.
I agree with Graham about not changing Yogi's diet as I too just want to give him whatever he wants for as long as I can. I also completely understand Handh for changing Herbies diet. Each situation is different and I think that somehow our dogs tell us what we should do.

This week I am going to start working from home some mornings so I have been given a remote access account from work. Now being a bit of a technophobe, I have been told what I need to do to connect from home but I am sure I will probably get it wrong. There is an alarming amount of passwords and passcodes that need to be input at each step. Now which one comes first ............... :o)

5 comments:

HandH said...

So sorry about your Mum, but I guess they need to take things one step at a time - doctors are always cautious about scheduling things. I hope things go smoothly on Tuesday, and that she's back home soon. The Xmas party sounds impressive!

Lesley Rigby said...

Fiona,

I wish I knew what to say to you. I can't imagine how you must be feeling at this time and with so much worry. I just hope that writing things down is helping you. I will certainly be thinking of you and your mother this week and hoping like mad everything goes well. Not forgetting your beautiful Yogi - Lots of kisses & good wishes, as always, for a "Brave Soldier".

Fiona said...

Thanks both of you. I'm sure it will turn out fine in the end. Sometimes it's just the shock of a new bit of info that sends me spiralling into despair. The "Brave Soldier" is still being brilliant thankfully :o)
Lesley, did Poppy go to her new home yet? I've been hoping that everying is going well?

Lesley Rigby said...

Yes Fiona, thanks for asking. Poppy was taken yesterday. The lady who collected her was a "Mother Earth" type of person who looked very capable of looking after 50 Guinea pigs along with 50 'kids'!! I hope I am right in thinking I couldn't have found a better home. She had kept Guinea pigs for 15 years and knew far more about them than we did. I'm not sure she will get the spoiling she has been used to but friends are probably more important to her (I am telling myself that....!) I have been thinking about her all day and hoped that once school finished she wasn't being juggled by the children. It's pretty cold here to and so I am also thinking "Is she warm enough"? Aren't my worries small compared to yours?

Fiona said...

I am so pleased. I would be worrying about the same things as you. But if she is being kept with others, they should keep each other warm. And it's surprising how much heat they generate. I used to panic about my rabbits and my duck living outside. Often I would go out in the night and put my hand under them, they would always be beautifully warm (and slightly bemused at this nutter disturbing their sleep). Anyway, worries are worries, no matter how big or small, they are difficult to deal with. I am sure she will be fine. Yogi sends lots of licks and says that he thinks she will be fine too :o)